Owh, know what, Jinny screwed up with Mlia and they're fine now. I screwed up with one good friend of mine, we're still not fine, cause she started ignoring me about 40minutes ago. Jinny had tried to call Mlia so many times but she didnt answer his calls. I somewhat lost my phone/left it in the salon, and I ransacked my room for any old books which contains her number, and found none. I looked for friends online who knows her and have her number. No one online did. They all have phones to sms her for me though, but I don't have her number in my head[but now I do].

[okay, no more 'Jinny and Mlia', I just did it for fugs.]
I changed my msn nickname just incase she was online but had blocked me, so I asked her to stay online! I'm guessing it didnt work that way. Then I typed her an email. Explaining what I meant to say, and that I had no bad intentions. And of course, that I am very very very truly sorry from my heart, and if I lied that I had no bad intentions, I swore upon my heart that lightning would strike me. I wouldnt swear such things, my dear good friend, what more with lightning! I can't even sleep with thunder!

Girl, I'm really sorry, and I'm not going to type my explanations here, I've sent you an email. Our friend is right now being middle man, helping me to text you and all, I'm sorry I cant do it by myself, because I left my phone, god knows where. I'm being such a wuss right now, my heartbeat's racing against each other.

And at times like this, we always do need someone to calm us down and tell us everything would be okay, and anyhow comfort us, right? Wouldn't you? Well, thankfully I have Shi Ching to text my good friend for me, and she even came online again to tell me what my friend replied[well, even if you didn't, Shi Ching, thank you.]At times like this, when you feel horrible, you feel like such a piece of dung, you start looking for someone. And your last resort would probably be your diary, which doesn't answer you. Sometimes, most of the times, it's best to go straight to your diary. It's good if you have someone to spill them to, so that they can answer you and comfort you. But it's much better to not get an answer but you could still spill, and you don't get ignorant messages.

Sometimes we just want a tad bit of attention at times when we're down, sad, worried, fugged-tub, scroodup, feelin like a shithead, or just unhappy.And how to we try to get the attention, we act/be a wuss. Some do the manja thing. Some talk suicide. Some just want to stand on the chair that swivels, and then fall backwards. And we'd always hope for nice words like, "aww, don't.. if you do, who would I have?", "it's not worth", you know, nice words! And when we are in such moods, such sensitive moods, we happen to ask "do you miss me?" or "how much do you sayang me?", we'd normally hope for "of course I miss you" or "okla okla, miss you la.." or "I sayang, a lot.....". But we'd feel like standing on the chair and falling backwards, so much, if we get an answer like "uhm, I dunno?".

I'm not giving lesson on how to handle people who enjoy or is being a wuss at most times, for small issues. I'm just expressing what a wuss I am, and how I thought I'd be treated. I guess I think too far, I hope too high, it's all too much that I'm asking for.

This being a wuss part of this post is not about my misunderstanding with my good friend. I'm not here for sympathy cause I think I lost my phone. Some people think that this is such a wrong time to worry about all this shyt, like whether he/she's mad at me, whether I just had a misunderstanding with my friend, whether I'm currently mad at my date or not, whether I should shave my legs or not, whether I left my phone in my great grandma's undies, or in the salon, whether I should fall backwards off the chair or not. Talk about the relevant[only] examples I gave, be in such a situation, then you speak. I know SPM is fugging near and around 3 corners, I know I haven't been doing much, I know I dream too much, but can't any of you be nice enough to help me through, or just listen and give some cushion, and then only tell me not to worry too much about this first...? I guess I have to tell people exactly how it feels, then they'd get me. And by then, it's too late.

Yea, I think I'll decide to fall backwards off the swivelling chair. Then get a scissors stabbed into this body. and then say "Have a Fucking Good Night!".