Therapeutic.

I would be the craziest student to be blogging at this time of my life. It's modern maths paper tomorrow. I'm just here to express how glad I am that Sejarah is done and done. I might not do as well as other students, especially ones in the Science stream, but I did my best so far. I'm proud of myself even though I do not know my results yet. History has been the toughest subject for me ever since I was introduced to it. I have never scored well in it. I have never done well in it. When you do not do well in something, it makes you not want to do it even more. For some people it might be the other way round, but for me, that's just how it goes. What I'm saying is that I have never really studied Sejarah for any exam, not really even for SPM. If you do not study anything at all, it's gonna be really difficult to do your exam. I did last minute studying. I know I regret because I could have done better. But now that it is the past, I decide to be happy that I have atleast finished an essay question with confidence and not reffering like I do when I practise. This exam period has caused me a long-term itch and it is easily agitated by stress, anger, frustration, or simply hurt by words. Yesterday, after my BM paper, I told my dad my fingers hurt from writting. He said because I never do enough work. Thanks. My fingers were feeling a slight pain when I touched the tip of it, because I have small handwritting and I was adjusting to the position of holding the pen higher so that my handwritting would not be so difficult for the invidgilator to read, so that he/she would not be turned off by my handwritting and give me a cute chicken egg which could similarly look like this --->0 . Today someone told me something that got me right in the face. And I felt like the stupidest person living today. I was talking about how happy I am with what I did for my History paper, but 'someone' told me that 'someone' didn't know doing history needs reffering. Thank you is all I can say, because you're smart and I am stupid because I have to refer when I do history. Friend, I hope your prom date would not be affected with eczema during prom in her pretty dress with her not-so-pretty self scratching like an asshole. I hope.

Mod. maths tomorrow morning. Gotta run.

Listening to: Oxcyde - Therapeutic